英语长篇笑话故事

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英语长篇笑话故事（通用7篇）

　故事是一种文体，它是通过叙述的方式讲一个带有寓意的事件，那你知道关于讲述“笑话故事”有哪些吗？下面是我为大家整理的英语长篇笑话故事，仅供参考，欢迎大家阅读。

英语长篇笑话故事 篇1

　A young mother believed that it was very wrong to waste any food when there were so many hungry people in the world. One evening, she was giving her small daughterher tea before putting her to bed. First she gave her a slice of fresh brown bread and butter, but the child said that she did not want it like that. She asked for some jam on her bread as well.Her mother looked at her for a few seconds and then said, When I was a small girl like you, Lucy, I was always given either bread and butter, or bread and jam, but never bread with butter and jam.Lucy looked at her mother for a few moments with pity in her eyes and then said to her kindly, Aren't you pleased that you've come to live with us now?

　一位年轻的母亲认为，世界上还有许多受饥饿的人，浪费食物真不应该。有天晚上，在安排幼小的女儿睡觉之前，她给女儿喂夜宵。她先给她一片新鲜的黑面包和黄油，但孩子说她不喜欢这样吃。她还要一些果酱涂在面包上。母亲看了女儿几秒钟，随即说道，露茜，当我象你一样小的时候，总是吃面包加黄油，或者面包加果酱，从来没有面包既加黄油又加果酱。露茜看了母亲一会儿，眼中露出怜悯的神情，然后她柔声说：您现在能跟我们生活在一起难道不感到高兴吗?

英语长篇笑话故事 篇2

　A father said to his sons: "Tomorrow your mother is going to bake a pie. Who is going to eat it?"

　The oldest son replied: "Father, Ill eat it all!"

　The father then said: "Tomorrow Im going to butcher a pig. Who is going to eat it?"

　The same son answered: "Father,Ill eat it all!"

　The father added: "Tomorrow, we are going to plough the field. Who is going to plough?"

　The oldest son answered again: "Its always me, always me. Now its someone elses turn to volunteer!"

　总是我

　一位父亲对他的儿子们说：“你们的妈妈明天要烙一张馅饼，谁要吃呢?”

　大儿子说：“爸爸，我要把它都吃了。”

　父亲接着说：“明天我要杀一口猪，谁要吃呢?”

　又是大儿子说：“爸爸，我要把它都吃了。”

　父亲又说：“明天我们要耕地，谁想耕地呢?”

　大儿子再次回答道：“总是我，总是我，这次还是让其他人来做吧。”

英语长篇笑话故事 篇3

　Good news: Two boys went out climbing trees.好消息：两名男童出去爬树。

　Bad news: wone of them fell out.坏消息：其中有一人摔下来了。

　Good news: There was a hammockbeneathhim.好消息：他下面有一个吊床。

　Bad news: There was a rakebeside the hammock.坏消息：吊床旁边有一个耙子。

　Good news: He missed the rake.好消息：他和耙子擦肩而过。

　Bad news: He missed the hammock too !坏消息：他也和吊床擦肩而过！

英语长篇笑话故事 篇4

　The squad（班，小队） were having "visual training". One smart recruit（新兵，招募） was asked by the officer to count how many men composed a digging party in a distant field. The party was so faraway（遥远的，恍惚的） that the men appeared as mere dots, but unhesitatingly（迅速地） the recruit replied：

　"Sixteen men and a sergeant（中士，军士） , sir."

　"Right, but how do you know there's a sergeant there?"

　"He's not doing any digging, sir."

　班里正在进行“视力训练”。一个聪明伶俐的新兵被班长叫出来数远处旷野上采掘队的人数。采掘队在很远的地方，那些人看起来只是一些小点儿。但是这个新兵毫不犹豫地回答。

　“十六个兵外加一个中士，长官。”

　“正确，可是你怎么知道那儿有一个中士？”

　“他不干活，长官。”

英语长篇笑话故事 篇5

　不必再看眼科医生了

　It had been many years since my last eye exam,and my wife was pestering me to make an appointment. The more she nagged , the more I procrastinated. Finally，she made an appointment for me.

　我己经很多年没做眼睛检查了。我妻子总是催我去挂个号。她越是督我，我越是耽搁不去。最后，她替我挂了个号。

　The day before I was to see the doctor，I was in an affectionate mood. After kissing and hugging her, I told her she really looked. good to me.,

　在我去见医生的前一天，我的.情绪特别好。我对妻于又是亲又是抱，还说她是我眼里最漂亮的女人.

　"That does it,”she said.“I'm canceling your appointment."

　她说:“这回眼睛没问题了，那我现在就去把号退了。”

英语长篇笑话故事 篇6

　After my husband，John，and I moved to Michigan from Nebraska，our new friends，proud of their beautiful tree一lined roads，teased us about the Mid-west's dull，flat，treeless land. When my parents，Nebraska farmers，visited us，I asked them about their trip.

　我和丈夫约翰从内布拉斯加搬到密西根后，我们新认识的朋友们总为他们美丽的林荫大过引以为荣.他们嘲讽我们的中西部平原荒凉、贫瘩，连株枯树都没有。后来我父母从内布拉斯加的老家来看我们，我问他们对旅途的感受。

　What a boring drive，"my father replied."Once you get to Michigan, there's nothing to see but trees."

　我父亲抱怨着:“枯澡，乏味，一进入密西根，除了树什么都没有。”

英语长篇笑话故事 篇7

　The little girl was sitting in her grandfather's lap as he read her a story. From time to time, she would take her eyes’ off the book and reach up to touch his wrinkled cheek. By and by she was alternately stroking her own cheek, then his again.

　小女孩坐在祖父的膝上读故事。她时不时的从书上转移视线抬起头来碰到他褶皱的脸。随后她摸摸自己的脸颊又回去摸摸祖父的。

　Finally she spoke, "Granddaddy, did God make you?"

　最后她问：“爷爷，是上帝创造的你吗？”

　"Yes, sweetheart" he answered, "God made me a long time ago."

　“是啊，甜心。”他回答道：“上帝很久前创造出了我。”

　"Oh" she said, then "Granddaddy, did God make me too?"

　“喔。”她回答。接着又问道：“爷爷，上帝也创造了我吗？”

　"Yes, indeed honey" he assured her. "God made you just a little while ago."

　“是啊，当然了宝贝。”他向她保证：“上帝只是不久前创造的你。”

　"Oh" she said. Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, "God's getting better at it now isn't he?"

　“喔。”她回答。又分别感受了两人的脸颊，边观察边说：“上帝的技术越来越好了，是不？”

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求一个经典英文笑话

关于英语的笑话

英语笑话之一

昨天来了个外国人，进到办公室，前台**左看右看，大家都在打游戏，只有自己比较清闲，就面带微笑的："Hello?"

外国人："Hi."

前台**："You have what thing?"(你有什么事?)

外国人："Can you speak Eng-lish?"(你会讲英语吗)前台**："If I not speak English，I am speaking what?"(如果我不会说，那我现在说的'什么)

外国人："Can anybody else speak English? "(还有谁能讲英语吗)

前台**："You yourself look. all people are playing，no people have time，you can wait，you wait，you not wait，you go."(你自己看看，所有人都在玩呢，都没空，你愿意等就等，不愿意就走你)

外国人："Good heavens. anybody here can speak English?"(我的上帝，这儿有谁会说英语吗)

前台**："Shout what shout，quiet a little，you on earth have what thing."(喊什么喊，安静点，你到底有什么事)

老外："I want to speak to your head."(我想和你的领导谈谈)

前台**："Head not zai.You tomorrow come."(头儿不在，明再来吧)

英语笑话之二

室友：圣诞节到了，我会把袜子挂在窗户上，我希望你们能在我第二天醒来

给我一个惊喜!

我：没问题，我知道你最喜欢吃学校前门那个小面包`

我一定买来放到你的袜子里面!记得吃哈?

室友：..............

Room friend:Christmas day arrived, I can hang the sock on the window, I hoped youcan second days wake in me

For me pleasantly surprised!

I:Does not have the question, I knew you most like eating school frontdoor that young bread `

I as soon as order put to inside yours sock! Remembered eatsKazak

Room friend: ..............

　 更多英语笑话推荐：

　 简单英语幽默笑话带翻译

　 带翻译是简短英语笑话大全

　 中国式英语笑话

　 英语口语小笑话

　 2014最新最经典英语笑话集锦

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Let me take it down

An elephant said to a mouse ,"no doubt that you are the smallest znd most useless thing that Ihave e ver seen ."

"Pless ,say it again .Let me take it down ."the mouse said ."I will tell a flea what I know."

为我所用

一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。”

“请再说一遍，让我把它记下来。”老鼠说。“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。

Two birls

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

两只鸟

老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？

学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

老师：请说说看。

学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

The Fish Net

"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"

"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.

鱼网

"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安？" 老师发问道。

"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。

The New Teacher

George comes from school on the first of September.

"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.

"I didn\'t like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....."

新老师

9月1日， 乔治放学回到家里。

"乔治，你喜欢你们的新老师吗？" 妈妈问。

"妈妈，我不喜欢，因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。"

A physics Examination

Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard.

The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls?

Nick\'s answer: Because our eyes are before ears.

一次物理考试

在一次物理考试时，当同学们都还在苦思冥想时，尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。

这个问题是：为什么在打雷时，我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声？

尼克的回答是：因为眼睛在前，耳朵在后。

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